Marriage Counselor - Coping With Infidelity

Copyright (c) 2012 Paul Ruffilio

As a part of the marriage vows, couples usually promise to stay true to themselves. No one vows to be untrue in their marriage. However as things progress, some marriages find themselves facing this unexpected problem. This circumstance always results in uncertainties in the marriage. This can be resolved or lead to the final breakup of the marriage.

When we talk about coping with infidelity, we are really considering both single experiences and situations where it appears to be On-going. It is normal to handle this issue very carefully as it can be highly touchy. If an individual you know is in a marriage in which the partner has cheated repeatedly, would you advice that the person stays on in that marriage?

You have only read an example of marriage counseling questions that come up every time. It's almost difficult to give a clear cut answer that would be generally acceptable. It all usually comes down to the wishes of those involved.

There are two issues here that a marriage counselor would be examining and these include: the cause of the action and what could be done to prevent it and repair the marriage. In my time doing counseling, I have yet to meet anyone who came in without really having an idea of what they want to do. They are generally only searching for endorsement. At the end of it all, the individual who gave the advice would generally bear the blame if the outcome is less than desirable.

This is the reason why a therapist would spend some time attempting to help you discover yourself so you can understand exactly what you want. As painful as it may be, the pain would heal with time. Don't make the mistake of making a decision that could affect you for the remaining of your life on the strength of that moment's hurt. Lot's of regrets have come about this way. The decisions you are thankful for years down the line, never actually feels convenient when you are taking them especially when it involves things like infidelity.

Something I've said severally is that a person would find it easier to cope with infidelity if they are certain it would not reoccur. It turns to a much more difficult issue when it persists. Like I noted, it is difficult, not impossible. It is obvious that the main thing to be handled is the reason for this persistence. In my opinion, the one thing that would give the marriage a chance of survival is primarily discovering the reason why the issue keeps repeating.

This is why going for marriage counseling is really important. During counseling sessions, the real cause(s) of this problem can be identified and a solution formulated. It is really necessary that as a first step, the couple concede to the fact that there's a challenge that they have to handle. Each of the couple require some form of assistance. The guilty spouse needs assistance with the problem and the other partner has to learn how to cope.

It's critical to never take a decision in anger. There are a lot of homes that have been destroyed just because a person took a decision in a hurry. We know you are hurt, but you can take a moment to consult a marriage therapist before making a decision.